Gender Roles

Prior to arriving in this country, my partner and I did not fit into the typical gender roles. He helped out in the kitchen every night, we shared the responsibilities of cleaning the apartment, and we each did our own laundry. Now, ten months into our stay here, we realized that we fit into the stereotypical gender roles completely. I cook all the meals and wash all of the dishes. I clean the house. He does a lot of the laundry while I am busy cleaning and cooking. At many religious functions, we are introduced as Sir _______ and his wife. Oftentimes, he is called upon to say a few words on our behalf. It seems that it is the woman’s job to stay somewhat in the shadow of her husband. Some of these things have taken a while to adjust to, while others have just fallen into place without us even recognizing it (like the cooking and cleaning). It is amazing how quickly your behaviors can change when you are in a culture that has very strong traditional gender roles. Also important to mention is the large role washing machines and dishwashers have played in the liberation of the woman. It is almost impossible for a woman here to even consider going to University and pursuing a career, because 90 percent of the day is spent washing, cleaning, and cooking. There are no restaurants in our villages for days when you are just too busy to cook any food. Many families do not own refrigerators, so all food must be prepared that same day and the leftovers are tossed out. Laundry involves hand washing all clothes. This is very time consuming and labor intensive. So women, I think we all need to be extremely grateful for the invention of the dishwasher, the microwave, and the laundry machine, among others, for greatly improving the quality of our lives and allowing us to pursue other occupations if desired.